I have heard a lot of interesting stories around abs, who has them, how to get them, even how to fake them. Thought I would share some of the crazy some of the serious and some of my theories.
So let's start with the truly crazy:
Implants: Yes skip the work outs, skip the gym, and the healthy food. Don't worry they can make it look real with abdominal implants under your skin. That's right 30 minute abs just got real. If I know you and you just considered this don't tell me.
I only have a few issues. This requires you to be put under which means you might not wake up. Yes I know how often this is done and how it hardly ever happens but why take the chance when it's not life threatening? Next, if you don't have definition already or if you gain weight this is going to look horrible. I personally think plastic surgery should be saved for burn victims and people born with deformities. Large breasts attract my attention, I'd be lying if I said otherwise, however as soon as I even think the they are fake I'm not interested. If you are crazy enough to try this you probably would like to know that just about all muscles can be implanted so you look like this guy. But in all seriousness if you decide to get these please rearrange them into a smiley face and send me the picture.
Etching: Ok I hate to admit this but this option gives me pause. Personally I could never do it but...... well you decide. Etching is another form of surgery. From the limited research I have done the concept is a form of selective liposuction that targets the fat pockets around the abdominal muscles. This is for those people that work at the gym 3 hrs a day and eat right and still can not quite get that definition. For sustained results you have to continue to go to the gym. While I still personally disagree, I have less of an issue because these people still have to put in the effort. If you have never done a sit up, or leg raise, or side bend then it doesn't matter how much fat they take off you still won't have anything to show for it. That being said I still consider this unnatural and could never do it personally.
Abs in a Box: I really shouldn't be surprised by this one but really? Have you ever seen the far side comic with the guy that has ab definition tattooed on. I was really hoping to find a picture of that. Please send me the link if you find one but I found this instead. Damn near the same thing Abs in a Box is a semi-permanent stain that you put on to give the impression of curves in the right places. I also think this is stupid but can you imagine the people that buy this thinking they have a true quick fix? Honestly unless you are a makeup artist the possibilities for screwing this up are endless. And, because it "works so well" it's water resistant. So if you get carried away and paint the Mona Lisa on your gut, it's going to be there for a while. I do see how this would work for super models and makeup at photo shoots. As a matter of fact it makes me feel ever so slightly better about myself know that these "perfect people" have help. My last comment on this, dumbest tagline ever. "Paint away Flab" then they show women that are already super skinny and just add definition. if you have any flab this isn't going to work.
I don't know if it makes me feel better our worse that these things are actually available out there. Better that I am willing to actually work to get abs or worse about humanity that people think this is a viable alternative. None of these things will make you stronger or healthier and without serious effort none of these things will make you look better. Save the thousands of dollars you were going to spend on surgery and buy a gym membership and start eating better.
/Actuator/
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